Monthly Archives: March 2012

Spring Has Sprung

It is Spring in Seattle. I know because my one daffodil has finally bloomed and I’m sneezing about eight trillion times a day.

My sweet daffodil.

If you notice my lovely daffodil is in a pot and there is only one. This daffodil has a story. Back when Jordan and I lived in a house we had a large backyard with a compost pile in the far corner. One Spring day as I was doing dishes I looked out the window. I noticed a smallish dot of yellow in the otherwise brownish mound of rotting earth stuffs. Curious, I abandoned the dishes and went outside. I found two daffodils had pushed their way through the soil and were happily swaying in the breeze. I was delighted, because I quite like daffodils.

We already had a large green pot (purchased during Half Price Pots going out of business sale) but there was nothing very pretty in it yet. So I got out my gardening gloves and trowel. I carefully dug up the flowers and transplanted them to the pot. For a couple years we had two daffodils bloom each Spring, but then, for whatever reason, only one began to appear.

So the one daffodil is a sweet reminder of a life I used to have and new beginnings. I always try to find something to appreciate when I move to a new place. It has been difficult these last few years adjusting to suddenly living alone. Being sad also makes it hard to find things that are cheerful. For a while I felt as if I had Dementors living in every corner of my life, it was that difficult to find happiness.

But things have gotten a bit better and I have found that I do love where I live now almost as much as I loved the little house Jordan and I shared and started our family in.

Among the many things I enjoy about our new home are the two trees in the backyard. In the winter they were bare and skeletal like most of the trees on the block. But there was nothing sinister about them and I thought they looked lovely in the snow.

See, aren't they lovely?

As pretty as they were in the snow, there are becoming even more beautiful now that Spring is here. They are bursting into bloom with the cutest little white flowers. Even though I’m sure that’s what making my nose and eyes itch, and causing my eight trillion sneezes a day I can’t help but breathe in their sweet fragrance. They smell heavenly and are just adorable. They are worth the sneezes I think.

Pretty trees decked out in their Spring finery.

Sweet sneeze inducing blooms.

What do you love about Spring? Or is there anything you dislike about Spring?

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A Great Debate: Abortion

Lately I’ve been seeing a lot of chatter on Facebook about birth control and a little about abortion. This is probably due to all the presidential stuff going on. “The Issues” are being discussed again so people are getting more vocal about their opinions. Normally I don’t tackle big issues like this partly because Ms. Non Confrontation pipes up and partly because I want my writing to be well researched. The problem is I hate doing research. I start strong, thinking I’m going to find what I need to know then get frustrated because the Internet is so damn huge and everyone is posting whatever they want. I can’t know for sure what is right and what is bullshit. So I guess I’ll just preface this by saying, I did some research. But most of this post is purely my opinion as viewed from my, admittedly limited point of view. So let’s dive right in shall we?

I started thinking seriously about my feelings on abortion in college. I went to a Christian university so I know I was supposed to feel one way about abortion and that was the pro-life way. But I just couldn’t get behind people who use fear, judgement and shame to try to guilt people out of having an abortion. I’m sure the woman getting an abortion feels bad enough already without being tormented as she walks in the door. I know, I know, not all pro-lifers stand by abortion clinics holding big signs of dead babies, shouting “Whore!” at every woman who walks in the door. But that’s what you think of first when you hear pro-life right?

I decided a long time ago that I’m pro-choice. Let me explain. This is my body. I have free will. I’m an adult. I am capable of deciding what happens with my body. Just like deciding to drink, smoke, exercise or sit on my ass all day. I should be the one making the choices that affect my body. My biggest issue with overturning Roe vs. Wade, or making abortion unconstitutional is the government’s involvement. I don’t like the idea of the government telling me I can’t make a choice that directly affects my body and frankly my entire life. I’m the one who is going to be impacted the most by the pregnancy (duh!). My body is going to be the one that morphs over 9 months not the government’s. Even if I don’t keep the baby after birth, my entire life is going to be different and it will probably never be the same again. For a decision that huge I think I should be the one pulling all the strings.

I’m going to be clear about something. I don’t think of abortion as a form of birth control. I’m not going out having unprotected sex thinking if I get pregnant I’ll just abort the fetus. I’m well informed. I know where to buy condoms and how to use them, I know about the pill, and diaphragms and spermicides. I was married for four years without getting pregnant. I also don’t think of those methods as abortion (which is a whole other topic). I’ve never had to deal with an unplanned pregnancy, so I can’t say for sure what I would do. I will say that raising one child on my own is hard enough and adding another child would be overwhelming; I’d probably have to move back in with my parents…which wouldn’t be ideal. It would be especially hard if the father wanted nothing to do with the child.

Second reason for being pro-choice has to do with rape. I’ve read that the instance of pregnancy caused by a rape is rare, but it’s not unheard of. Imagine being the victim of a violent crime and having a constant reminder of it. Being forced to continue the pregnancy would be somewhat comparable to being forced to live with the person who killed your family. That person is always there, reminding you of the violence against you, but you just have to live with it and deal.

Pro-lifers say that with the proper support rape victims can turn out just fine and then put the baby up for adoption. Here’s the key, with proper support. “Proper support” can cost a pretty penny and what if the woman can’t pay? Is the government or those pro-lifers going to step in and pay for it? How long will they need proper support? What about after giving up their baby? It’s probably true, that with help, eventually, the victim will be alright, but the question of how that is paid for still lingers.

The last thing I’m going to mention is one of the arguments against abortion. There are many, but as I was doing research for this post I came across this article: http://womensissues.about.com/od/reproductiverights/a/AbortionArgumen.htm. I’d like to pay special attention to reason #2 against abortion. It says “No civilized society permits one human to intentionally harm or take the life of another human without punishment, and abortion is no different.” Really? You think so? Then explain how the death penalty is not a civilized society taking the life of another human without punishment. And then explain this “The concept of personhood is different from the concept of human life. Human life occurs at conception, but fertilized eggs used for in vitro fertilization are also human lives and those not implanted are routinely thrown away. Is this murder, and if not, then how is abortion murder?”

I know I haven’t even begun to scratch the surface on this topic. There is so much more involved (isn’t there always?). What are your personal thoughts on abortion?

Single Parent Appreciation Day

A Facebook friend posted about Single Parent Appreciation Day. I looked on the Internet and it told me this a real thing and it’s today. So if you were raised by a single parent or if you know a single parent today is the day to tell them they’re awesome!

If you have friends who are single parents and want to make them feel special on any day (it doesn’t even have to be today) there is one thing that could make their day. Offer to babysit. I don’t mean in a general whenever kind of way. I mean pick a day that you’re not busy and offer to hang out with their kid for a couple hours so they can grab a coffee, run errands, get dinner, or just get out of the house.

I have no problem asking for sitters. I like to go out and so I know if I’m going to be able to go out I’ll have to find someone to be with Jack while I’m gone. Thing is when I ask so much I start to feel the “mommy guilt” kicking in. I know I spend plenty of time with him. I deserve some time to myself, but when you’re asking for sitters so often it all builds up and makes itself into the “you’re a bad parent” monster.

If you really want to help out the single parents in your life, just pick a day and offer it up. Chances are you won’t be turned down.

Holy Crap! I Got A Major Award!

I was going to post about a controversial topic today (Ms. Non Confrontation be damned) and then I checked my email and saw I had some comments from the lovely Jacqueline at maturestudenthanginginthere. I have actually received a major award! No it’s not a leg lamp, although that would be totally bitchin’. It’s the Versatile Blogger Award! Yay, thank you Jacqueline!

There are rules that go along with said award and here they are.

1. Thank the award-giver and link back to them in your post.

2.  Share 7 things about yourself.

3. Pass this along to 15 recently discovered blogs you enjoy reading.

4. Contact your chosen bloggers about the award.

I can easily share 7 things about myself. I’m not sure I can meet the 15 blog quota though because I’m not sure what they mean by recently. I’ve got some folks in mind, but it’s not like I just started reading their blogs, I’ve been reading for awhile. Whatever, we’ll see what I can come up. On to the 7 things!

First, I hate working out. I do yoga three times a week and call it good. The only reason I work out at all is so I can eat cookies and drink beer without getting huge.

Second, I don’t eat candy much, but when it’s not in the house I feel like I should to out and buy some. Even if it’s just sitting there I just like having the option.

Third, I love Seattle. I have lots of friends here, and there’s always lots to do, but there are some days mostly in the winter when I wish I could pack everything up and move back to the desert.

Fourth, my favorite movie is A Life Less Ordinary. Ewan McGregor makes my legs shaky and my heart melt. *Siiiigggghhhh*

Fifth, In college I went mermaiding…twice. Which is going to a body of water with most of the girls on your dorm floor in the dead of night, removing all your clothes and running into the water. This might not seem risque to some, but to me as an “innocent” college freshman, it was super racy!

Sixth, I can be ridiculously shy, so I find it sort of funny that I put myself out on the Internet so easily. Yay anonymity!

Seventh, I still have my lava lamp from high school.

Honestly I haven’t discovered many new blogs recently, so I’ll just list some of my favorites along with the one new blog I’ve come across.

The first one is actually recently discovered.

Kenneth Author

Me and My Shovel

Peas and Cougars

Reasonably Ludicrous

The Snarkist

That’s all I can come up with at this point. Sorry it’s not 15, I guess I need to find time to explore more. I’ll work on that.

Abandonment Issues

I have started watching a show called Skins. It follows a group of teenagers in Bristol, England through their last two school years. I. Love. This. Show. I am completely addicted and already on Season 2. I can’t really explain what I love about it. I like it because it doesn’t portray teenagers in a patronizing or fake way, it all seems very authentic. It makes me think of the issues I dealt with while I was that age and a part of me (the brooding, emo teenager part) really identifies with it. I like that they tackle controversial issues, but still manage to make the show funny. Because that’s how life is, dramatic and controversial, but also quite funny. All the characters are great but my favorites are Sid and Chris, followed closely by Cassie and Maxxie.

There was one episode I saw recently that really stopped me in my tracks. It almost made me cry which is saying a lot because I make it a point not to cry during TV shows, or movies or books. (Which has become much more difficult since becoming a mother.) Chris, who is a party animal, wakes up one morning to find an envelope of cash on the kitchen counter with a note from his mother saying she’ll be gone for a few days. We find out later, after Chris has spent all the cash on a gigantic party, that his mother’s room is empty. She has abandoned him. We also find out later that his father is a dick, who won’t take him in and his older brother has died.

This really got to me, because I was absolutely baffled by the fact that his mom just left and his father refused to even see him. Perhaps his mother has other issues with drugs or alcohol or something. Whatever the reason, it still makes me mad. Partly because I love Chris, and partly because I simply cannot see any reason to abandon my own son. As a mother I don’t know how she did it. In fact the more I think about it, the more I’m convinced drugs or something like that have to be involved. Maybe it was the death of her first son that sent her into a crazy spiral and that’s why she abandons Chris, but still.

I know I don’t have a teenage son yet. I don’t have a son that’s constantly taking random drugs and partying all the time. I know I’ve got a sweet two and half year old, so maybe I could not possibly understand. But I think, no I know for a fact, that even if Jack does become a terrible teenager I would never, ever leave him. He’s my son and that means something to me. No matter what he does, or who he becomes, I will always protect him and love him with every fiber of my being. If he needs help I will find it for him, even if he doesn’t want it. If he runs off, I will never stop looking for him. If he’s a perfect angel and never steps a toe out of line I will rejoice and be glad that he didn’t get my reckless streak. I would do anything for my son. I really don’t understand a mother who doesn’t share that same feeling.

Update: I’ve finished watching season 2 and now know why Chris’ mom left. I still don’t get it. It doesn’t seem like a good reason at all. If it were me, given the circumstances I would have stayed and spent every chance I could with Chris, but I supposed that’s just me.

Also at the beginning of season 3 they started with a new batch of students and honestly I’m not feeling the same attachment. This batch of kids don’t even seem like friends at all. They are much more selfish, no one cares about anyone else and Effy is so dammed depressing. Three of the boys are supposed to be best friends from primary school, but it really doesn’t seem that way. I’m not really connecting with any of the characters and find myself annoyed with everyone for being so self centered all the time. I keep watching hoping it will get better, but I’m not sure if it will.

Update 2: Finished season 4 and I’m pretty much done with the show, even though there’s one more season on Netflix and I think one more coming. I don’t think any batch of students can live up to the awesomeness of the first one. So now I’ll stick with Battlestar Galactica and Doctor Who. Doctor Who put up new episodes on Netflix last night and I was ecstatic! Seriously I’ve missed Matt Smith so much!

Lady & the Tramp is Scandalous

Jack loves Lady & the Tramp. I’ve seen this movie at least ten times by now. Anytime I suggest watching a movie he always pulls out this one. We watched it the other day. I sat down with him and actually watched it. When you watch it through adult eyes, it’s quite a scandalous film.

I’m being totally serious, it is called Lady & the Tramp after all! It starts out innocently enough with Lady as a puppy, we see her grow up and then find out her masters are going to have a baby. In the movie Jim Dear circles the month of April as the month the baby will be born. During this time we meet the Tramp, who is a slutty male dog who thinks Lady is cute (which she is).

Next baby is born. We’ll assume in April because that’s what Jim Dear circled earlier. So Lady meets the baby, sees it’s not so bad and actually likes him. Then Darling and Jim Dear decide to go on vacation. I’m going to assume they wait a few months. Let’s say they go on a trip in the fall, say October or November. Then the stupid Aunt Sarah with her lame cats comes and ruins everything.

After being taken to the pet store for a muzzle Lady runs off and who should she run into but the Tramp! So they start hanging out and he promises to get the muzzle off. Here’s where the scandal starts. After the muzzle is off, they go on a date and kiss and then spend the night together. We are led to believe nothing happens since this is a children’s movie, however, I believe something sexy must have happened between the two of them. Why?

Because, later Lady gets caught by the dog catcher and goes to the pound. While there she finds out the Tramp got down with a long list of lady dogs and is really hurt by it. Then even later, when he comes by with a bone (hahahaha) to make amends Lady talks about how frightened and embarrassed she was. Embarrassed huh? Unless something sexy happened I don’t see what she has to be embarrassed about. Oh! I almost forgot! Jock and Trusty come over to offer their hands in marriage. Possibly to make an honest bitch out of her. (Hahahahaha! I’m cracking myself up.)

So then at the end of the movie it’s Christmas, Tramp is adopted by the family and oh holy crap! There’s puppies. A dog’s gestation is between 53 and 68 days. So it fits with timeline of Lady running off and spending the night with the Tramp. See scandalous story. At least the Tramp makes an honest dog of her. Although, one has to wonder how many other puppies he has running around out in the world. He’s a tramp after all.